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marnixR
Post  Post subject: the joke thread  |  Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2016 11:00 pm
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at the request of just about everybody : here's the joke thread

I'll start with one that got me the disapproval at DevShed :

how many Microsoft engineers does it take to change a lightbulb ?

answer : none - they just declare darkness the industry standard

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iNow
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2016 12:56 am
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Q. What is the square root of 69?

A. Eight something.

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"[Time] is one of those concepts that is profoundly resistant to a simple definition." ~C. Sagan


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:03 am
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Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.




After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.




One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, Kin ya swallar?'




The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'




The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no.




The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.




The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I never seed nobody done


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:04 am
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Two bowling teams, one all blondes, one all brunettes, charter a
double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City.

The brunette team rides on the bottom level of the bus, the blonde team rides on the top level.

The brunette team, down below, is whooping it up and having a great time until one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs, and she decides to investigate.

When the brunette reaches the top, she finds the blonde team staring straight ahead at the road, frozen in fear, clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.

"Whats going on up here?" asks the brunette. "We're having a great time downstairs!"

"Yeah," screams a terrified blonde, "but you've got a driver!"


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:05 am
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True bravery is arriving home late after a boy's night out, being
assaulted by your wife with a broom, and still having the guts
to ask,
"Are you cleaning, or were you flying somewhere?


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:06 am
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A Texan and his bride ask the hotel desk clerk for a room, telling him
they just got married that morning.

"Congratulations!" says the clerk. Looking at the cowboy, he asks, "Would
you like the bridal then?"

"Naw, thanks," says the cowboy. "I reckon I'll just hold her by the ears
'til she gets the hang of it.


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:07 am
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The Perfect Breakfast As a Man Sees It
You’re sitting at the table and your son is on the cover of Wheaties, your mistress is on the cover of Playboy, and your wife is on the back of the milk carton.


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:07 am
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Well you guys ASKED FOR THEM!!! *L*


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Daecon
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:52 am
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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Half a dead baby.


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Robittybob1
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 8:31 pm

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@ Daecon - that is not a joke.


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 8:58 pm
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just curious - why HALF a dead baby ?

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"Someone is WRONG on the internet" (xkcd)


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Pong
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2016 9:52 pm
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The other half must be bad taste.


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Daecon
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 7:30 am
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The usual punchline is "finding half a worm".


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GiantEvil
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2016 5:36 pm
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I got your joke Daecon. I've found half a worm in my apple before.

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It is wrong always, everywhere, and for anyone, to believe anything upon insufficient evidence.
-W. K. Clifford-


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iNow
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2016 5:43 pm
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What does a three dimensional square have on its genitals?
.
.
.
.

Cubic hair, of course.

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"[Time] is one of those concepts that is profoundly resistant to a simple definition." ~C. Sagan


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GiantEvil
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Wed Jun 15, 2016 6:34 pm
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What is grosser than gross?

Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon.

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It is wrong always, everywhere, and for anyone, to believe anything upon insufficient evidence.
-W. K. Clifford-


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Falconer360
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Thu Jun 16, 2016 4:42 pm
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Three dogs are sitting at a vet office and the first dog turns to the second and asks what he is in for.
Second dog says, "Everyday, my owner comes home to me peeing all over the house. Can't help myself, so he is putting me to sleep. What are you in for?"
First dog says, "Well everyday, my owner comes home to me shitting all over the house. Can't help myself either, so he is putting me down to sleep as well."
They both turn to the third dog and asks him the same question.
"Well my owner always does the cleaning completely naked, and one day while she was bending over to dust, I couldn't help myself and I started humping her like crazy."
The first dog says, "So she is putting you down to sleep?" Third dog replies, "Nope, she just sent me here to get my nails trimmed."

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"For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled." Hunter S Thompson
"It is easy to kill someone with a slash of a sword. It is hard to be impossible for others to cut down" - Yagyu Munenori


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: Welcome to all .com refugees.  |  Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 7:26 am
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A man boarded an airplane and took his seat.

As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane.

He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his.

Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?"

She turned, smiled and said, "Business, the Annual Sexual Education Convention in Chicago."

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen, sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for sex education!

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?"

"Lecturer," she responded. "I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

"Really," he said. "What myths are those?"

"Well," she explained. "One popular myth is that African American men are the best endowed, when in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait."

"Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Jewish descent".

"We have, however, found that the best potential lover in all categories is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly, the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry, "she said. "I shouldn't really be discussing this with you. I don't even know your name."

"Tonto," the man said. "Tonto Goldstein. But my friends call me Bubba."


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: Welcome to all .com refugees.  |  Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 7:38 am
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One hot and humid July day on a rural Iowa highway, a state trooper pulled over a farmer for breaking the speed limit. If you know farming, after weeks stuck on the farm and mostly going no faster than a tractor, it's enjoyable to get away from the farm and at high speed.

Anyway, in his most officious manner, the trooper began lecturing the farmer about the hazards of driving at excessive speed. The farmer didn't take kindly to the lecture, but didn't show it ... instead occasionally nodding in agreement.

The trooper then took out his pen and began to write out a speeding ticket. As he wrote, he kept swatting at the flies that had begun buzzing noisily around his head.

The farmer said, "Having problems with them circle flies there, are ya, Officer?"

The trooper stopped and looked at the farmer. "Well, yeah, if that's what they are — I never heard of circle flies," he said, giving another flick of his hand.

"Well, they're common on farms," the farmer explained. "They're called circle flies because they're usually found circling around the back end of a horse."

"Oh," the trooper replied, and went back to writing out the ticket. After a moment he paused. "Hey, wait a minute, are you trying to call me a …?"

"Oh no, Officer!" the farmer exclaimed. "I have far too much respect for law enforcement and police officers to even think about calling you such a thing!"

"Well, that's good," said the trooper as he tore off the ticket and handed it to the farmer.

As the farmer started his pick up, he turned to the trooper. "Hard to fool them flies though."


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: Welcome to all .com refugees.  |  Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 7:40 am
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A woman is driving toward home in Northern Arizona when she sees
a Navajo woman hitchhiking. Because the trip had been long and
quiet, she stops the car and the Navajo woman climbs in.

During their small talk, the Navajo woman glances
surreptitiously at a brown bag on the front seat between them.

"If you're wondering what's in the bag," offers the woman, "it's a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband."

The Navajo woman is silent for a while, nods several times and says, "Good trade."


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: Welcome to all .com refugees.  |  Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 7:40 am
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Lorena Bobbitt's sister, Louella, was arrested yesterday for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition and Louella has been charged with a ..... Misdewiener


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2016 7:55 pm
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Q. what do you call a chav with 2 brain cells ?
A. pregnant

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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
"Someone is WRONG on the internet" (xkcd)


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Robittybob1
Post  Post subject: Re: Welcome to all .com refugees.  |  Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2016 12:29 am

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babe wrote:
Lorena Bobbitt's sister, Louella, was arrested yesterday for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition and Louella has been charged with a ..... Misdewiener


A Misdewiener!


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iNow
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 3:01 pm
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Image

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"[Time] is one of those concepts that is profoundly resistant to a simple definition." ~C. Sagan


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 8:36 pm
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3 things to look forward to in your old age : you snore in your sleep, you can't keep your farts quiet anymore, and ... and ... I can't remember the third one

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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
"Someone is WRONG on the internet" (xkcd)


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iNow
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2016 7:33 pm
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I have to thank Moontanman for this one:

Image

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"[Time] is one of those concepts that is profoundly resistant to a simple definition." ~C. Sagan


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: I'm sad to see the .dot com site die  |  Posted: Sat Jun 25, 2016 7:15 am
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MODNOTE: This post originally appeared in the dot com refugees thread


Have jokes but can't post in the joke place....there is no Submit button so


A Texan and his bride ask the hotel desk clerk for a room, telling him
they just got married that morning.

"Congratulations!" says the clerk. Looking at the cowboy, he asks, "Would
you like the bridal then?"

"Naw, thanks," says the cowboy. "I reckon I'll just hold her by the ears
'til she gets the hang of it


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 25, 2016 9:44 pm
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Falconer360 wrote:
A new guy in town walks into a bar... (snipped by INow to address rendering problem)


what's up with this post ? some of the text comes up as bold italic Times New Roman and goes off the page, even though the underlying text doesn't appear to show any text modifiers
it wasn't like this earlier on

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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
"Someone is WRONG on the internet" (xkcd)


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iNow
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 25, 2016 10:20 pm
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marnixR wrote:
what's up with this post ?

It's been like that since posted when viewed via mobile. My instincts are that this is a latex related issue or is tied to an invisible character from the text source, but that's purely conjecture.

I've deleted it and edited your quote to remove. Reposting original now below.

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iNow

"[Time] is one of those concepts that is profoundly resistant to a simple definition." ~C. Sagan


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iNow
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sat Jun 25, 2016 10:21 pm
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This joke was originally submitted by Falconer360 above. Reposting here to fix formatting issue

----------------

A new guy in town walks into a bar and notices a large jar filled to the brim with Strange Coins. The guy approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"

"Well, you pay 10 Strange Coins, and if you pass three tests, then you get all the Strange Coins."

"What are the three tests?" asks the new guy

"Gotta pay first."

So the guy gives him the 10 Strange Coins, and the bartender adds it to the jar.

"OK, here's what you have to do. First, you have to drink that whole bottle of pepper tequila -- the WHOLE thing at once -- and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a pit bull chained up out back with a sore tooth. You have to remove the tooth with your bare hands. Third, there is a 90-year-old woman upstairs who's never had an orgasm in her life. You gotta make things right for her."

"Well, I know I've paid my 10 Strange Coins," says the guy, "but I'm not an idiot. No wonder you've collected so many Coins -- that's impossible!"

The Guy proceeds to drink several whiskeys, and eventually, he gets up his nerve.

"Wherez zat teeqeelah?" he slurs.

He grabs the bottle of pepper tequila with both hands and downs it, gulp by gulp. Tears are streaming down his cheeks, but he doesn't make a face. Next, he staggers out back. Everyone in the bar hears a huge scuffle outside -- barking, yelping and growling, then silence.

Just when they think the man must be dead, he staggers back into the bar with his cloak ripped and gashes across his body.

"NOW," he says, "wherez at ol' lady with the sore tooth?"

------------------

LOL. Thanks, Falconer!

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iNow

"[Time] is one of those concepts that is profoundly resistant to a simple definition." ~C. Sagan


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:26 am
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A man boarded an airplane and took his seat.

As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane.

He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his.

Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?"

She turned, smiled and said, "Business, the Annual Sexual Education Convention in Chicago."

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen, sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for sex education!

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?"

"Lecturer," she responded. "I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

"Really," he said. "What myths are those?"

"Well," she explained. "One popular myth is that African American men are the best endowed, when in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait."

"Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Jewish descent".

"We have, however, found that the best potential lover in all categories is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly, the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry, "she said. "I shouldn't really be discussing this with you. I don't even know your name."

"Tonto," the man said. "Tonto Goldstein. But my friends call me Bubba."


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:28 am
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Little Johnny and the other Boy Scouts were out collecting bottles for a fund
raising activity. Little Johnny knocked on a door and a sour-faced lady came to
the door and asked, "What do you want, Sonny?"

"D-d-do you have any beer bottles for the Boy Scouts, M-m-m-ma'am?" he asked.

"Look here, young man, do I look like the kind of lady who would drink beer?"
asked the lady.

"S-s-sorry, Ma'am, w-w-what about vinegar bottles?" replied Little Johnny


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:29 am
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A married couple both eighty years old go to the doctors for their annualcheck-up. They were put in seperate examination rooms.

The doctor enters the room where the husband is waiting and does a check-up and proclaims 'You are extremely healthy for your age, are there any concerns?

' Yes' says the gentleman, 'When I make love to my wife I sometimes getso hot that I turn the air conditioner on. Sometime I get so cold that I have to turn my heater real high.'

Puzzled, the doctor says that he does not have an answer for him and moves on to examine his wife. After performing a full check-up, he finds her as healthy as her husband.

The doctor is totally perplexed by what the husband has told him and decides to ask the wife about it. The doctor asks the wife if she has any ideas why he feels so hot one time and very cold the next time when they are making love.

The wife proclaims to the doctor 'Oh, that old fool, it is because we only make love once in the winter and once in the summer


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:30 am
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The Perfect Breakfast As a Man Sees It
You’re sitting at the table and your son is on the cover of Wheaties, your mistress is on the cover of Playboy, and your wife is on the back of the milk carton.


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:30 am
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Obama and Biden are having breakfast together. The waitress
comes to the table and asks "Gentlemen may I Help you?"

Biden orders eggs over easy, bacon, and toast. Obama says
"mmmmm... I'll have a Quickey" and the waitress leaves the
table in disgust!

Obama asks "What's wrong with her?"

Biden answers "That's pronounced 'Quiche'."


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Falconer360
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2016 10:05 pm
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Thanks Inow! Sorry for the issue.

_________________
"For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled." Hunter S Thompson
"It is easy to kill someone with a slash of a sword. It is hard to be impossible for others to cut down" - Yagyu Munenori


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:56 am
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A Texan and his bride ask the hotel desk clerk for a room, telling him
they just got married that morning.

"Congratulations!" says the clerk. Looking at the cowboy, he asks, "Would
you like the bridal then?"

"Naw, thanks," says the cowboy. "I reckon I'll just hold her by the ears
'til she gets the hang of it.


Top
babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:57 am
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I have posted these to the other Forum, but some aren't there anymore so sorry if I am boring ya....just tell me! *S*


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:57 am
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True bravery is arriving home late after a boy's night out, being
assaulted by your wife with a broom, and still having the guts
to ask,
"Are you cleaning, or were you flying somewhere?


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:58 am
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Two bowling teams, one all blondes, one all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City. The brunette team rides on the bottom level of the bus, the blonde team rides on the top level.

The brunette team, down below, is whooping it up and having a great time until one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs, and she decides to investigate.

When the brunette reaches the top, she finds the blonde team staring straight ahead at the road, frozen in fear, clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.

"Whats going on up here?" asks the brunette. "We're having a great time downstairs!"

"Yeah," screams a terrified blonde, "but you've got a driver!"


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2016 9:09 am
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Image

can't figure out how to post an image

Help??

this is what I got
https://scontent-lax3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/ ... e=57CB537C

https://scontent-lax3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13418718_10154265424209252_5224220247795304072_n.jpg?oh=61634d1459e7a9f8d318255a35c08ead&oe=57CB537C

Image

edit MR: corrected the first and last attempts
what you need to do is start with [img], followed by
the image url and then finish with [/img]


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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2016 9:09 am
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Becky was on her deathbed with her husband, John, maintaining a steady vigil by her side. As he held her fragile hand, his warm tears ran silently down his face, splashed onto her face, and roused her from her slumber. She looked up and her pale lips began to move slightly. "My darling John," she whispered.

"Hush, my love," he said. "Go back to sleep. Shhh. Don't talk."

But she was insistent. "John," she said in her tired voice. "I have to talk. I have something I must confess to you."

"There's nothing to confess," replied the weeping John. "It's all right. Everything's all right, go to sleep now."

"No, no. I must die in peace, John. I slept with your brother, your best friend and your father."

John mustered a pained smile and stroked her hand. "Hush now Becky, don't torment yourself. I know all about it." he said, "Why do you think I poisoned you?"


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 7:14 am
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one of my favourite geek jokes :

a wife sends her husband who's an IT engineer for an errand,and asks him to buy a 4-Pinter of milk
"and, " she adds, "if they have eggs, buy six"

when her husband returns he's got 6 4-pointers of milk with him
they DID have eggs, after all

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babe
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 7:51 am
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groan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 2:33 pm
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the reason I like it so much is that it clearly exemplifies the dictum that "a computer does what you tell it to do, not what you THINK you told it to do"
hence if people acted like computers, this would be the result

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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
"Someone is WRONG on the internet" (xkcd)


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Macgyver1968
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 2:38 pm
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A man walked past an antique shop, and something in the window caught his eye. It was a brass statue of a rat. Something about the statue intrigued him, so he went in the store to investigate. He asked the store owner about the statue, and the owner replied, "Ahhh...that is a very special statue. If you want to buy it, it's 100 dollars, but if you want to hear the story behind the statue, it's 1000". The man wasn't paying 900 bucks to hear a story, so he bought the brass rat, and walked out of the store.

As the man walked down the street, he noticed something unusual. Rats started coming out of every nook and cranny and started following him. The further he walked, the more rats started following him. Eventually, every rat in the town was following him, so he walked down to the river and threw the brass rat into the water...and all the rats followed to their death.

The man immediately ran at full speed back to the antique shop and burst through the door, breathing heavily from his long run. The store owner said, "Ahhh...I see you're back to hear the story behind the statue!" The man replied, "Hell no, I just want to know if you have a brass lawyer!"

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Macgyver1968
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 2:43 pm
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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his crotch.

The bartender says "Hey buddy, you got a steering wheel attached to your crotch"

and the pirate replies, "Arrrrgg, it's driving me nuts."

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Fixin' shit that ain't broke.


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Rory
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 6:24 pm
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Nice one, marnix. I did actually read it as, "if they have eggs, buy six 4-pinters" :)

News headlines can be confusing, for the same reason

"Include your children when baking cookies"

"Miners refuse to work after death"

"Hospitals are sued by 7 foot doctors"

More here: http://www.fun-with-words.com/ambiguous_headlines.html

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If you are doomed to be boring - make it short. Andre Geim


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janus
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2016 7:57 pm

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A young women overhears the following conversation between three men at a bar:
First man, "I think its spelled W-O-O-M."
Second man, " No, I think there's an "h' in it and its W-H-O-O-M."
Third man, " Your'e both wrong. It's W-H-O-O-M-B."
First man again, " Wait, I don't think we have enough "o"s, it might be W-H-O-O-O-M-B."

The young women gets up, walks up to the table, says, "Gentlemen, the word you are looking for is spelled "W-O-M-B.", and then leaves the bar.

One of the men turns to one of the others and asks, "Do you think she might be right?"

His friend responds, "No way. I doubt a little slip of a girl like that has even heard an elephant fart."


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marnixR
Post  Post subject: Re: the joke thread  |  Posted: Thu Jul 14, 2016 9:24 am
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when treated properly, the common cold should last no longer than 4 days
however, when left untreated, it could last as long as 96 hours !

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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
"Someone is WRONG on the internet" (xkcd)


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